Tuesday, December 11, 2012

This Is Your Fault, Randy

Dear Diary,

I am no longer a vegetarian. I haven't eaten meat for close to ten years. That’s another part of my old self that I have abandoned. My new diet consists of red wine and hamburgers from Amsterdam. They are the best I have ever tasted. 

Randy is pouring on the guilt. How could I leave home two weeks before Christmas? How was this going to make him look? What was I doing? I was going to ruin my life. I answered his e-mail with four words:

My Life Is Ruined.

Then I added another twist of lemon:

This Is Your Fault, Randy.

Love, Jess

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